Josephine Suhs

aspiring television writer / All around funny gal

Trying to park in a crowded LA lot is the worst!
My mom is a magician.
Who wants to dream about work or school? Not me.
I love this show. It's my guilty pleasure.
I love my family and am so thankful for the time I got to spend with them recently. However, family is always funny in the best way.
I love the beach but going to the bathroom is a real hassle
I won't ever get it.
We've all got them. Maybe some of yours are the same. Maybe not.
I actually really dig this brand of tea and drinking it. shout out to my friend Chelsea for the idea!
I don't get flip flops
need I say more?
Anyone else? No? That's fine.

First Thai Massage - I have questions! 

Remember this board game?
We've all seen it - a bed covered in pillows. Why, though?
I never know which one is the right one.
Here are some things to not do when calling a restaurant.
Are picnics just a big hassle..or is it just me?
I have a love / hate relationship with DIY's (mostly hate). I'm not crafty and not patient . So enjoy my sarcastic take. P.S. Much love for you crafty humans out there. I'm actually super jealous.

I love sunsets. But when the sun is at that one spot when driving it's the worst.

Dear Tina Fey you should hire me to be a PA. Here's why.

I lose my Apple TV remote every day. Here's what usually unfolds...

We're all familiar with Jimmy Kimmel's "Servers Read Mean Tweets". Just like many other people, we decided to put our own spin on this hilarious bit. As servers in a restaurant, reading yelp reviews can be frustrating. Why not make it fun for once?

Adult coloring books are sweeping the nation. Apparently coloring relieves anxiety. I gave it a try. #adultcoloring #adultcoloringbooks

A video I did to try to and get Mindy Kaling to notice me. Desperate? Maybe. It hasn't worked...But one day she will realize I'd be the best writers PA in all the land!

 

DEAR TINA FEY AND AMY POEHLER,

It’s me Josie. Oh wait, I forgot. We’re not actually best friends…that’s just a reoccuring dream I have.

Anyways, I’m writing to say thank you. I’m sure you get this a lot…Random thank you’s for being amazing, beautiful, confident, funny, strong women. Women that have been true role models as I continue to grow up (I think technically I’m an adult…people tell me that I am but I don’t feel like it). Both of you are so inspirational to me, who I am, and what I want to do with my life. You see, I am an average looking, 23 year old who’s really bad at math, and laughs at her own jokes too often. I moved out to LA 4 months ago and now work at a restaurant. Annnnd although I know this will sound like I’m a professional stalker…Amy Poehler I’m aware that you have ordered food from us because we got a fax from “Parks and Recreation” and I nearly peed myself. Too much info? Probably.

Anyways, you both have taught me that it’s okay to be funny, to laugh at myself, and you make me want to achieve my dream of writing for television that much more.

Amy, let me tell you that “Parks and Recreation” has changed my life. I know you’re not the only one involved but I had to tell you that. I laugh at every episode and I will admit I’ve seen each season more than once…twice…three times?

And Tina, (we’re all on a first name basis in my head so I figured for this letter it’d be okay) your writing on “30 Rock” as well as your acting is impeccable. The jokes are smart and I find myself wanting to quote Liz Lemon much too often.

I’m writing this because my past 4 months haven’t been easy, moving to a big new place and thinking AHHHHHHHHH constantly or WHO WEARS HEELS LIKE THAT ALL THE TIME. SHOULD I? I’ve had moments of complete loneliness where I marathon watch “Chopped” like nobody’s business…it’s a good show. WHO’S DISH IS ON THE CHOPPING BLOCK!?.TELL ME.

But I know I’m here for a reason. And I’m not sure what it all means but I'm happy  to have strong female role models like the both of you annnnnd Kesha. I’m kidding, I’m not that into glitter…On the real, you two don’t compare to any other women out there. You’re fearless at least to me. And yes, I always wonder what it would be like if we all met by happenstance…Romantically bump into each other and you were like (simultaneously)  “Josie we want to be your mentors because we love what you’re working with girrrrrrrl.” Or something like that, I haven’t worked out the details of the interaction quite yet. So I mean, if that doesn’t happen at least I can say that I blogged about you. It’s what all the young hip kids are doing these days. Especially the poor post graduate ones, like me!

Oh and Amy if you ever want to meet up for lunch, your Salmon Quinoa is on me ;) after all I get an employee discount.

-written in 2013

post college hum drum

FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS. YOU CAN BE ANYTHING YOU WANT TO BE!

Really? Are you sure? Because I have a bachelors degree and I can’t even get a waitressing job. I feel like I should start out like they do at AA.

Hi my name is Josephine Suhs and I am a recent college graduate and I’m unemployed.

For as long as I can remember I’ve had one job – being a student. Although this occupation had its fair share of agonizing studying, frustrating teachers and exasperating exams, at least I knew that’s what I needed to do. From grade school to college-my job was go to school and get good grades.

WE’RE SO PROUD OF YOU HONEY!

The end result being…graduating, finding a job, and making money. I always pictured postgraduate Josie, diploma in hand, moving to a big city and having that secure adult job. This daydream included office attire, maybe a pencil skirt, a white blouse and a steady pay check.That’s why I was working so hard, right? I’m not sure. Now I sit in my very first apartment, at my Craiglist-purchased (it was a steal) table. I sit here and ponder…I could have been a nurse,

A dentist?

A dental hygienist?

An engineer?

No. I couldn’t be any of those things because I’m a 23-year-old dyslexic kid who really likes making movies and I’m pretty good at it. So what? I follow my dreams and move to Hollywood, BABY, where I spend everyday searching, hoping that my two years of restaurant experience and my amazing smile is enough to get me hired. Okay, life is tough and it isn’t fair. But am I working for a dream that doesn’t exist?No one told me about this transition period, this weird time where I’m an adult and need to start taking on my own responsibilities, cut free from my parents, flee the coop and leave the nest. No one told me as they encouraged to go for my dreams that there would be no jobs.

I’m not knocking college, I promise, I’m not. I learned valuable things, and I made great friends. I learned a lot about myself that has shaped the individual and simply hilarious human being I am today, and for that I say an expensive thank you! But it would have been nice to prepare me for this discouraging time. I just feel like yelling from the top of a mountain:

I’M QUALIFIED FOR A POSITION HIRE ME, HIRE ME.

And I know I’m not the only one, I have friends in New York, Los Angeles, and back home in Michigan feeling this same way, living out of their parents’ homes and working minimum wage jobs. I feel lost, and confused.  I’m at the prime of my life! And, I’m broke! So now it’s up to me. I’m going to push, I’m going to fight, and I’m going to make it. But I think it’s time we re-examine the expense. The reality is we live in a world where bachelor’s degrees are becoming “not enough”, student debt is at an all time high, and so are college graduate unemployment rates. I went to college and I studied to find a career in that field.I don’t have all the answers. I’m just angry. And I think I have every right to be.

-written in 2013